Cancer and Johnny Rotten

Long week this one.  Getting adjusted after vacation I suppose, and a crazy busy week at work.  We were supposed to see the oncologist today---I'm glad the appointment got moved up and we got it over with.  I'm really not sure why it was so difficult for us.  It's not as though I expected to walk in and have them say 'whoops, no cancer after all!" but just the same it was difficult.  Last night Ernie drank too much beer and broke down and cried (sorry Ernie).  As hard as it is to see him like that I was glad to see it. He tends to be Mr. Stoic and I think he really needs to let it out sometimes.  We sit there and all we want to say is 'it's not fair." But then we shrug our shoulders because we know that's not how life works.  What IS fair?  Is it fair that I gave birth to two beautiful, healthy boys and others struggle either with infertility or health issues with their children?  Is it fair that Judi has cancer?  Is it fair that we watched my father slowly fade into the shroud of Alzheimer's?  There is no fair.  Ernie and I have been blessed with a relationship and marriage that is more than either of us could have imagined.  We've been blessed with two children who GOD KNOWS I never could have imagined.  So now we have this.  Maybe not fair but life just the same.

I came across this video visiting an interesting Australian blog and it's been stuck in my head ever since.  It's a beautiful song.  Perhaps beautiful isn't a word that you think of with PiL but then again I always thought the Sex  Pistols were a great pop band.