Transitioning

I haven't been sleeping well of late.  It seems I go through phases where I do....and then again when I don't.  Lately I keep having terrible dreams....sometimes they are about my sister Debbie.  I dream she is very ill and no one can figure out what it is and I'm afraid she is going to die.  Sometimes my mother is by my side, sometimes not.  I wake up feeling sick.  And although I know it's just my mind trying to make sense of the transition  from a family of five to a family of two but it leaves a lingering pall sometimes.

You know, lately I've been writing about packing up the house and how difficult it has been.  Sometimes I feel sort of ashamed as I know how lucky I was to have my parents well into old age.  So it's not that I feel sorry for myself....I hope it doesn't read that way.  I wish my parents' last years had been easier----that's my only regret. And of course I wish I had my sister Judi.  As Ernie and I left the house the other day I started laughing----I told him we'd be doing much better if Judi were still here as she'd be telling us to KEEP WORKING!

Once the house closing is done and that worry is off my back it will be easier.  Then I only have to worry about my mother's fight with the IRS but that's another story!

Enough rambling.....

Here are the boys decorating the tree pre-disaster.  And thank you Shaun for the good idea about the stand!  I think we'll try that later tonight when Ernie is back home....