Unsettled and Disturbed.
Yesterday was a thoroughly unsatisfying day. We had an appointment with Ernie's oncologist and were waiting on his PSA results and a bone scan because of shoulder pain he's been having. I had a WHOOSH busy day at work and Ernie picked me up a bit after 3:00. We headed over to Carle, got checked in, and went to sit in the waiting room. A few minutes later, after rejecting an Easter issue of Woman's Day and looking jealously at Ernie's current issue of Wired, someone came out and said, "Oh, we made a mistake, your appointment was cancelled, the doctor is on vacation." Yes.
We trotted back downstairs, whereupon they told us he should still go back upstairs for his Zoladex and his Zometa. I said he wasn't getting the Zometa, we had been going to discuss that with the doctor. They nodded and gave me a gift certificate as I was getting irritated. We went back upstairs and tried to figure out the new Chemo Room routine. We talked to a couple of folks, they were apologetic and lovely. They wanted to reschedule us for August 31st and I said, "oh noooooo....we're not waiting til August 31st for test results." They said they'd send the doctor's nurse over. We got a good spot in the infusion suite and then a volunteer talked to us endlessly. Endlessly. Then they told us they couldn't find the doctor's nurse. Then they found her. She came over and was very nice. I explained (when it's about Ernie, I talk...when it's about me, Ernie talks. Much easier to talk for someone else than yourself I guess) what was going on and that while we didn't necessarily need an appointment, we needed results. She said the doctor had to release those but she would talk to him and get back to us. O.k. Ernie got his injection with the huge needle and we left feeling somewhat unsatisfied. Oh wait, before that they told us they'd looked it up and we had been called three times and gotten a letter about the appointment. Hmmm. Well, no doubt they did but I still don't understand why we still got a recorded phone call a day or so ago saying, "A member of your household has an appointment on...." Whatever.
He took me for a drink and we kind of looked at each other grumpily. Then we went home and found a letter about the bone scan, saying the results were fine. Oh. O.k.
Just an odd evening. It made us tired.
We tried to eat dinner. Owen decided this was the perfect time to begin asking a million questions about autism, down syndrome, cerebral palsy and various other health conditions. I like the fact he's thinking about all these things but all I wanted to do was eat dinner. Instead I was googling things on my iPad to make sure I was telling the right thing. Finally, worn down, I asked if I could eat my dinner. He agreed.
Ernie and I curled up to watch episode 2 of the 1995 BBC Pride and Prejudice. We'd never seen it before. Ernie told me I would have been Lydia or Kitty. I ASK YOU. REALLY? I protested, he kept insisting until finally I realized he was making fun of me.
Hmph.
I finally accepted the fact that we were too tired to finish the episode so I turned it off and made Ernie go to bed. He drifted off, making that sound somewhere between breathing and snoring and I looked at my iPad. I was going to read but I felt restless so I went to facebook and discovered that some friends had just lost one of their children, a man about my age. I turned my light off and tried to sleep, unsettled and disturbed.
Heartfelt loving and sorrowful thoughts go to our friends Bob and Jan Campbell, on the death of their son Rodger.
An unsettling day.