The Sandwich Life

Used To Be....

It used to be that I refused to start celebrating Christmas until closer to the date....but that was back when time didn't fly by as quickly as it does now. In recent years I've realized that if I want time to enjoy the music and the decorating without feeling crazed the entire time, I need to start earlier...and thus, although I used to think it awful....we start the weekend after Thanksgiving

My friend Kathleen tried to get me to get our Christmas tree before Thanksgiving. The kind of tree we both like, the old fashioned Balsalms (which are also $19.97 at Prairie Gardens) seem to get shorter every year so if you don't go shopping right away the tall ones are all gone. The boys flatly refused to get a Christmas tree before Thanksgiving and I couldn't really fault them. So yesterday we trotted right over and got two wonderful tall trees.....one for the living room and one for the dining room as per usual! Then I have to pick out my annual new tree for the mantel. Owen found the winner this year. And then of course I always get sucked into letting them each get a new ornament....so it all adds up despite the cheap trees but I, like my father was, a sucker for Christmas.

Leo is the keeper of the Christmas gene in our family. My sweet curmudgeon cheerfully came downstairs to help his father dig the boxes of trees for the mantel out of the basement. The boys carefully unpacked them and I shouted out who had given them to me. Judi started the tradition and many are from her, then my friend Eileen gave me many (including the house favorite Ikea tree) for years...and there's a delightful red one from Kathleen, an amazing pipecleaner one from Gail, and who know what other ones I'm forgetting.

Leo also carefully unpacked and put up the advent calendar that their Aunt Judi gave them. The deal was that SHE was going to always send the present for it damn it! Well, we will trot out today and try to find some, in her memory. Judi was particularly good at it though.

So my mantel is set and I am happy now.

And a holiday nod to East Nashville, because the trees have outgrown the mantel there is now an outpost on the receiver where the Rod Picott birdhouse sits, and we listen to Tom Mason's Pirate Christmas (note: his slide guitar Christmas album is also wonderful....in fact we had that long before we'd ever met him) as we admire it all.

Just Family

As we were getting ready for Thanksgiving  yesterday I was fussing at the boys a bit to pick up. They were relatively good natured about it, Owen clearing the table and putting laundry away and Leo vacuuming. And as they did it, Owen commented that, "you know, it's just family coming over." It made me so happy to hear that he thinks of our friends Teri and Brian that way. Our family is small and so when our chosen family becomes real family to the guys, it brings me great joy.

The dinner may not have been my best, but the turkey was wonderful if I do say so myself, and the sum was greater than its parts. It was a lovely day.

We had Owen taste the starfruit. He took a nibble and had this expression for quite some time. He said it was blowing his mind.

I dry-brined (formerly known as salting---a comment I read online that amused me) the turkey with aleppo pepper and thyme....I think Ernie did it Tuesday morning. I dithered a bit trying to decided what temperature, etc. to cook it. We were kind of intrigued with several articles we'd read recently that recommended roasting it until the white meat was done, then removing the legs and thighs and finishing them by braising them in the cooking juices for another hourish. We decided we would try it. I started the turkey at 450 for a half hour, then turned it down to 325. I checked the temperature of the white meat about an hour before I thought it would be done.....the freaking thing was done. Way earlier than I wanted and no chance to braise the dark meat. I worried a bit that I had over cooked it but we just shrugged our shoulders. Our guests weren't even here yet so I decided to cover the turkey. So yes, we used my Dad's turkey cover (and my sister Debbie reminded me that when Dad bought that from Marshall Field's antiques department, without telling my mother, he not only had it delivered to the office, but also had it gift wrapped. So when my mother opened it, she first thought it was a lovely gift, only to find out her husband had bought it for an ungodly amount of money and not told her. Man she was pissed. It was always best to give Mom a heads up....she wasn't crazy about surprises). I wondered if it would fit over the turkey....Ernie grabbed it and dusted it off (and no it's not polished, and no, we never could find the mark on it Jim and Diana...maybe this year) and it fit perfectly over our 21 lb turkey still in it's roasting pan. We giggled with delight! My father would be so pleased----between this and Leo's 100% on the Constitution test, my Dad is having a hell of a great week in heaven!!! (poor wording perhaps?). I got to enjoy my favorite part of Thanksgiving....the cook's treat of nibbling the top of the stuffing that get dark brown and crunchy in the oven. No matter all the advice not to put the stuffing in the turkey....I must say the white meat was delightfully moist, the dark meat completely done and my gravy was stellar thanks to the gravy base I'd made ahead and the lovely pan drippings!

Teri and Brian showed up, we hung out, sipped prosecco and nibbled on lovely appetizers they brought. They make a gingerbread house every year....eventually putting it outside so that their cat can be entertained watching the squirrels devour it. I love that! So Brian and Owen started on the construction of it.

We still ate an hour and a half later than I had planned, even with the turkey done earlier. It's not a matter of cooking, it's just a matter of me liking to prolong that time before dinner, drinking wine and chatting....I hate to end it. Eventually we did pull everything together. We sat and ate....it was so fun to use my mother's Spode, the sterling and I filled in with the Coin Silver spoons which were still beautifully polished from last year. It gives me such pleasure to use these things. Ernie and I picked out a selection of some of our favorite flint goblets to use. We ended with  Bull's Eye and Fleur de Lys, Bellflower, Frosted Leaf, Comet, New England Pineapple and Lincoln Drape. I guess those details are for you Jim and Diana, because I don't who else will be interested in that. I told Ernie my new goal is to get a Bull's Eye and Diamond Point goblet....have never gotten one.

 

Afterwards we sat and talked at the dining room table. Leo told them all about the Union Pacific Big Boy and other train engines, Brian worked on the gingerbread house, Owen danced throughout periodically, and Ernie and I were happy. We put a fire in the fireplace and talked some more. I packed up some leftovers for Brian and Teri and the evening slowly drifted away.

Thanks to Teri and Brian, and a belated Happy Thanksgiving to all our relatives and friends who make up our family. We are indeed grateful and thankful.

Grateful for A Sweet Smart Ass Curmudgeon Who Can Write a Hell of Song

As I wrote in an earlier post, music is obviously important to me, and very few artists currently working are as important to me as David Olney. 

My family is of course what is most important to me, and I am beyond words, and almost beyond feelings, grateful for them this Thanksgiving. I am thankful that, despite the losses, no one was killed in the tornado that swept through Gifford. I am also truly thankful for the role that music plays in my life, that it comforts me, challenges me, enlightens me...it gives me joy and it somehow gives me a rock to hold on to.

It may seem funny to be asking for contributions on a day of giving thanks, but I am so thankful we have music in our world. I am thankful we can communicate through music and express joy and sadness in music.  And I am so thankful that I have been able to experience David Olney's music. I am thankful for the kindness and friendship that he and Sergio Webb have shown us. (Oddly enough David was in a dream of mine last night and I was telling him that I was pregnant, he was very pleased for me and was suggesting names. Sergio just smiled. Unfortunately I don't recall what names he came up with. Weird.)

And I know that just because he important to me and to Ernie, that doesn't make him important to you. However I know that many friends have had a glorious time experiencing his songs and performance at one of the three house concerts he has done for us. So if any of you can donate just the tiniest amount it would be great. It would make us feel as though we have contributed not just to his campaign but contributed to a community of those who love this music, if that makes any sense. The Kickstarter ends on December 6 so we're getting to the end. Do remember that you aren't charged until December 6, and even then only if he hits his goal. Please, please, please help make this happen.

Listen to this. It's a song about the Titanic. What sets it apart a bit is the fact that it's written from the point of the view of the iceberg. Damn I love him.

 

 

Oh, and in honor of Thanksgiving, his ode to the sweet potato:

 

 

oh, God, I can't help myself....I love this one too! And one of the youtube comments for this says, 

As God is my witness this man is one of THE BEST live performers I've seen in my entire 56 years on this earth! He is truly a Force of Nature! :o

 

Yup, that's my guy! Please watch this one....yes, yes, yes!

 

 

And sometimes he's just damn silly but that makes me happy too. This was at the first show he did for us.

 

We're Getting There

MENU

Appetizer from Teri and Brian

Pickled carrots

Mixed nuts

 

Roast turkey, dry brined with aleppo pepper and thyme

Gravy

Stuffing with sausage, sage and pear

Mashed potatoes

Roast squash with soy butter

Brussels sprouts, hashed with bacon/shallots/cream/mustard

Clementine/jicama salad with vinaigrette

Cranberry sauce with port

Cranberry relish

Dessert from Teri and Brian

To Do List

SUNDAY

Make pickled vegetables

 

MONDAY

Season turkey

Make another batch of cranberry sauce

 

TUESDAY

Make piecrust

Make meat pie filling

 

WEDNESDAY

Make coleslaw 

Defrost stocks, combine and reduce

Prepare meat pies

Uncover turkey, dry and leave uncovered

Make soy butter

Chop Brussels sprouts/shallots

Toast remaining bread for stuffing

Chop onions/celery/pear/garlic for stuffing

THURSDAY

Chop Clementine/blood oranges/jicama

Make vinaigrette for clementine

Roast potatoes in morning

Roast squash

Make stuffing

Turkey in around ten?

We're getting there! I am officially on a floating holiday as we speak, and it feels delightful. We've got the butter and mixer bowl/paddle all chilling so we can start on our pie crusts (crossed fingers....remember the Great Pie Crust Failure of December 2012). I've got a bit of a cold but Ernie's been Zicamming me to death and it's not bad. Our friends Teri and Brian have been sick but I'm hoping they'll be able to make it....although I don't want them to come if they don't feel up for it (Do you HEAR that Teri?). 

In my ongoing obsession with the Gifford tornado and my inlaws' old house (as I told my friend Nancy yesterday, I never realized I was like this until the last few years. She suggested maybe I hadn't always been like this and I said, "Uh, no...." I'm the one that memorized Ruth Webb Lee at 12 years old. And God knows my sweet little apple Leo didn't fall far from the tree. Anyway....I finally found an aerial shot that showed the area where Ernie's folks lived and it looked to me like the house was still there. So then I went into tax records to find the name of the woman who had bought the house from the estate and then I googled her and lo and behold, 

Debbie Farmer of Gifford was home with her son and his girlfriend when the twister hit Gifford.

"We heard the sirens going off, so we knew it was serious," Farmer said. "All of a sudden there was breaking glass, and a horrible wind was going through the walls. It was very scary."

The back end of Farmer's home was damaged. "At least my house is still standing," she said. "Many others weren't so lucky."

So I guess the house made it through despite damage. 

So that, the seeming resolution of the school issues we've been having, and the fact that I don't go back to work until Monday....and the smell of cooking in the house, oh, and Leo got 100% on his 8th grade Constitution test, which is making his grandfather immensely proud in heaven....all makes for a pretty good day. Happy Thanksgiving Eve all!

Random Notes from the Sandwich Life

1. For whatever reason it was a long weekend and I gloried in the fact that it was Friday yesterday. I was muttering to Ernie about it being such a rocky week and I said something like 'between life and work and school...." and I suddenly had this song stuck in my head the rest of the night.

 

2. Got to see my beloved Ann and Bob for dinner and drink at Fries and Peanuts. They are in the midst of their own Sandwich Life right now and my heart goes out to them. They always make me feel more myself and I can't thank them enough for that.

3. The winds from last Sunday's storms did no damage except to put one more nail in the coffin of our patio fence. Our fence, is, shall I say, uhhhhh....tired. It's been leaning a bit and the next day as we walked down the alley we though....uh-oh..... It may not be with us much longer. And the rest of the world will be able to see the disaster that is our patio. Sigh.

4. Indoor Farmers' Market today. Lots more vegetables that are year end heavy....Brussels sprouts, butternut squash, spaghetti squash, carrots, cauliflower, onions, and garlic.

5. Owen really wants a tv in his room so he can play his games up there. There's no way in hell of course but I gotta admit....sometimes it's tempting.....because he is incredibly LOUD. LOUDER THAN I CAN POSSIBLY DESCRIBE. He wears headphones so of course he doesn't even hear us yelling at him to be quiet....and even when we make him take them off so we can tell him....it lasts about 15 seconds. And yet...he's so cheerfully loud that eventually you just give up and turn your music up louder. It's interesting to listen to him though, earlier today I heard him say to another player, "that's rude, don't call me that, and by the way I'm not gay anyway." God I love that boy.

6 . No real plans today which feels delightful. Looking at the calendar over the next month we are really busy and I have a number of evening events for work so this will be the last completely free weekend until the New Year. I can't complain, I'll have about two weeks off over the holidays....the glories of working at the University. I remember working retail often enough that I still find that amazing.

And speaking of the holidays, I now unveil to you our fabulous Gerking poster for the Christmas party with Fats and Kristi Rose. Come one, come all! One of the best parties of the year!

Memories of Place and Time

I've been thinking a lot about memories lately. Of course I, as I believe my friend Kenny described himself once, was born nostalgic. Even as a little kid I found memories and traditions very important. And the older I get the more people in my age group have joined me so I no longer feel as alone. Part of the reason I've been mulling it over is because I've been pondering how upset I am about my in-laws' old house in Gifford being gone. Why does that means so much to me---why does it hit me as it does? I remember when I lost my sister Judi that I felt like I had lost so much of my history. And oddly, although this is an inanimate object that I had no formal ties to anymore...I again feel as though I lost a bit of my history. Is that what nostaliga is.....just fighting the feeling that bits of your life are being erased?

I've always been one to try to contain memories within things. Memories...history....why else am I so drawn to antiques and items with age....and why have I been since I was a young child? Things speak to me, maybe more than I should. We no longer use ice cube trays, but I used to always feel so guilty about leaving one lone icecube in the tray. But things other than lonely ice cubes can speak SO loudly. One of the most poignant remembrences of the day of the  Kennedy assasination was from my friend Toby Weiss. On Facebook yesterday she posted this picture, with the following comment:

This is the silk dress my mother wore to work on November 22, 1963. Even though it was one of her favorites, she couldn't bear to wear it again. The "Kennedy dress" just sits in a closet, and occasionally gets aired out, like this.

And I swear, those simple words, and the fact that the beautiful dress sat in a closet for all those years, because of that memory.....it said more than all the TV specials and essays and editorials could ever possibly say.

Thanks Toby.

Records, and History, and a Calling

As some of you know, Michael Pollock, whom I adore and have known since I was about 19 years old, is very ill. There is a facebook page and so many people have written messages or talked about memories. It is beyond moving....I even had my colleague Nancy crying and she doesn't even know him! What has been eye opening to me, as someone who knew him through Record Service, is the incredible impact he has had as a teacher. He left Record Service a couple of years before it closed I guess and began teaching History at Urbana High School. It's really inspiring to me because it's as though he found his true calling. What a gift that has been to him, and those who have been his students. Ernie and I read through the posts and just look at each other, and  all Ernie can say is, "I want him to teach Leo and Owen!"

Yesterday was Michael's last day in the classroom I can't even imagine how emotional that must have been. One of the posts on the page last night was from Dan Bechtel. I'm hoping, since the page is public, that  he doesn't mind me sharing this here, because I found it to be a wonderful summation of everything Michael has brought to his teaching.

Pics from Michael's 5th hour American government class today. In 10 years teaching with Pollock and countless hours spent together talking, planning, and sharing disdain for meetings together, this was the first time that I had a chance to watch him teach.

You know when you hear people over sell a movie and you finally watch it, and are disappointed?

This certainly did not happen today. Pollock, you are unbe-frikkin-lievable. Everything everyone says is true. In the course of a lesson on civil liberties, we discussed Miranda rights, the OJ trial, hung juries, double jeopardy, how Pollock got a speeding ticket and why it was his fault. We watched clips from the Chapelle show and Blazing Saddles, and all of this followed him beginning the class with setting off a Fart machine that he had hidden under a student's chair.

I have been holding tears at bay all week. While watching him teach, I was just so in awe that I couldn't do more than just appreciate a master at his craft. But when class wrapped up, and he began to say goodbye to his students, I had to look away to compose myself ( and I lost it after I left the room).

To say you will be missed does not do the phrase justice. Thanks for all you have given us my friend.

                                                                                                                            ~Dan Bechtel

Thank you Dan, and thank you to all that have written loving and funny and heartfelt messages for Michael.

I love you Michael. I love you Renee.

Memories and Lawsuits

I keep looking at the footage of the tornado destruction in Gifford. It seems as though my in-laws' old house must be gone. I find it hard to tell where things are in some of the videos but through my friend Nancy, I learned that the house across the street from my in-laws is gone, and from looking at the map and knowing that, as well as where another house, belonging to a friend of hers, is gone....it looks as though it would have been right in the path.

 

It struck me that I don't even know if I have a picture of that house. My father in law died when I was pregnant with Owen (Lord he would get a kick out of Owen) and my mother in law Alice died in 2004, so it was well before I started photographing the hell out of everything.

We were talking about it at dinner last night and Ernie asked the guys if they remembered the house in Gifford. Leo does but Owen was only 2 1/2 when Alice passed away. I remember doing some of the last cleaning of the house when it was empty and letting the boys ride their tricycles around the living room....I thought there was a chance he might remember that. He said, "Oh yes, I remember that house," only to go on and recount a story that was actually at my parents' brief tenure at Prairie Winds. What he remembers is playing in the closet and my father, who was in the thick of Alzheimer's, yelling at him. And I gotta tell you it breaks my heart that is the memory he has of my father. However, I do know that Owen is also the first one to talk about what Grandpa Joe would do, and he's proud that his middle name is Joseph, so I know that's not his perception of his grandfather but it still made me a little sad that he remembered that.

The whole family is in agreement however, that if my father were alive he'd be drawing up plans to sue the entire Champaign school district. Because it wouldn't matter what it was, if someone upset one of his beloved grandsons he would be quoting Supreme Court rulings left and right that proved they should be taken to court. If you knew my father you will just smile and nod your head in understanding. I do miss him.

Owen and my father, 2006

Emotional Hangover and Other Notes

1. I feel hungover, not the alcohol kind, the emotional kind I get after crying. Yesterday Ernie and I had a meeting with the boys' principal and two teachers and I found it beyond upsetting and frankly, rather shocking. That being said, I love the school principal and have great faith in her so things will work out. I cry when I get angry and then I cry when I get frustrated and then of course I cry when I see one of my boys upset because they are being treated with contempt and hostility. And then of course I cry when the meeting is all over and I'm sitting in the car. I wish there were some kind of vaccine for crying in meetings or other inappropriate settings.   The upside is that I think the boys know we are fully behind them, that we'll call them on what we think are their faults in a situation but that doesn't mean we won't stand up for them. I think they felt supported by us and by the principal and by one of the teachers. I guess 4 out of 5 isn't bad. I wish I could write more here but will restrain myself. In person though, I will be happy to bend your ear.

2. I've been using this goblet of late. I looked at it sitting on the window sill the other day and though that the pattern looked kind of 1960ish. It made me smile because the goblet is actually from the 1860s, not the 1960s, and I liked the way those parallels happened...

3. This is how I can tell that Owen did his trumpet and bass practice.

4. This song is stuck in my head. I'm so excited about having RB Morris playing at our house this winter on February 1, 2013. I was poking around looking for a video of this song and on one of the other versions, someone had left a comment saying, "RB has such a fatalism in his voice that everything he does cuts deep into your brain. This guy is the real deal." Perfect.

 

5. Last night Owen sat there in the living room, with Ernie's bass on his lap, listening to Fly Me To the Moon with me. He said, "You know when I was real frustrated and wanted to quit jazz band? If I had I wouldn't have found out about Frank Sinatra." And thus the Great Jazz Band Revolt of 2013 ended. And I gotta say, watching Owen sit and listen to Sinatra, bobbing his head just a bit, gave me more pleasure than I can possibly articulate.

6. We made a pretty good Brussels sprout dish the other night. Dijon Braised Brussels Sprouts from Smitten Kitchen. Her recipes are pretty dependable and I really liked it although I think I cooked them a hair too long. It was surprisingly light despite the fact that it had a bit of cream. I'm still not sure it will grace the Thanksgiving table but I'll make it again no question.

7. Part of my emotional hangover is not just my meeting yesterday, but still seeing the news of the destruction of Gifford by the tornado and most of all, the incredibly intense sorrow I have as I see a beloved friend in dire straits from that horrific thing...fucking cancer. For those of you in town, or who have spent time here, many of you probably know Michael Pollock. Michael was one of the owners and founders of Record Service, one of the great independent music stores that started in the 60's. Michael was my 'work spouse' at Record Service for many years. We figured our marriage was pretty good although we never agreed on music. Ha! Others know him from his time on Urbana City Council or from his time spent teaching history at Urbana High School. He is an amazing man and someone I love dearly. His wife Renee is one of my closest friends. I don't see her often but she's always there for me. There is an open group on facebook. If you are a friend or have a memory of him, please contribute. It is very moving to read.

8. And now damn it, I want to hear That's How Every Empire Fall Again. This time by Marianne Faithfull.

 
 

 

 

Gifford

I am just haunted by the pictures of the tornado damage in Gifford, Illinois. My mother in law died 9 years ago, but before that, for 20+ years, I spent numerous holidays, as well as other family visits, in Gifford. Ernie didn't grow up in Gifford, his parents moved there after he graduated high school....but since then, that was his family home.

Even though I'd heard the damage was bad, when Ernie and I watched the first video of it on the news, I gasped and covered my mouth, and tears came to my eyes. I can't quite tell if his parents house is gone or not....I thought I recognized their street in some of the videos but it's hard to tell. And of course, we have no formal connection to the house now, but every so often we'll drive by and we're always pleased to see it looking so good, doing improvements that Alice would have liked. My heart breaks for all of those impacted by this. I believe Gifford State Bank has an account set up for donations, and of course the Red Cross is involved. We will try to scrape together a little bit to donate. I've been following this page for information.