Words from Gina... and Remembering Judi....

If you followed along as my sister Judi fought cancer and lived with us, you will remember Gina.  The inimitable Gina....her friend and colleague in Clemson, who loved her fiercely and between taking care of her own family and everything else she does-----also masterminded all the care and help that people gave Judi....

She just sent out a wonderful email to Judi's friends.....

Greetings to all of you!

 

One of the nice and long-lasting benefits of Judi'scircle of friends is that, while I think of Judi daily, I am also frequentlyreminded of her friends for one reason or another.  Most often, I probablythink about all the wonderful and caring things you all did for Judi that meantso much to her--your visits when she was ill, your cards and letters and emailsand gifts, taking her to Edisto Beach, and the list goes on.

 

Sometimes the prompts for thinking about you comein unexpected ways like the one I am about to tell you.  A couple of weeksago, one of Judi's colleagues here at Clemson attended a national conference inSalt Lake City and ran into one of Judi's friends and colleagues, SandyNegley, at the conference.  As with many of Judi's friends and family,Sandy relayed to Dart that she has had a difficult time dealing with Judi'sdeath.  Sandy, you are NOT alone in feeling that way.  Which brings meto the point of this email--to simply ask that if you feel so motivated, pleaseget in touch with Sandy to share thoughts through email that mighthelp coping with and understanding our loss of Judi.

 

To lead into that, I have a little story torelay.  Being here in Clemson where I was blessed with 8 years asJudi's friend and colleague, reminders of Judi are EVERYWHERE!!!  I didn'tthink I would ever drive past her home on Pendleton Road without tearingup.  I didn't think that getting together with some of her other friendsand colleagues would ever be fun rather than sad.  I didn't think I wouldever be able to pet and play with a dog that looked anything like Wally! You get the idea. 

 

But things are changing.  First ofall--Wally.  Joan, a friend of mine here in town, has a new dog,and it looks just like Wally.  It's a pound dog whose name isSnowball.  Here's the weird thing.  Joan's husband was one of Judi'scolleagues in the PRTM Department who also had bile duct cancer and died only amonth before Judi was diagnosed with the same thing.  Snowball just"happened", and in a way Wally, Judi and Jess all live on in him.  And thatdog loves me.  He is all over me every time I see him, and he always findsa way to sit right next to me--a la Wally!

 

While I love the Wally part of this, there issomething even better.  The couple who bought Judi's house had gonethrough years of infertility and were undergoing various treatments when weclosed on the house.  Within a month or so of moving into Judi's house,Nettie was pregnant!  Their baby is due very soon!!!  I know this babywill in no way replace Judi, but I love thinking about a new life coming andbringing joy into Judi's home.  And I love knowing that Judi would likethis!

 

These are the kinds of things that are healingfor me.  My eyes are teary enough as I write this that I can barely readthe screen, but I'm smiling as I type.  That's progress, and each step inthat direction is one more celebration of Judi's life.

 

My love to all,

 

Gina

Sandy was one of Judi's dearest friends and I know she's had a hard time but I think I haven't reached out to her as much as I might because her grief feels too much like mine.  I love you Sandy.....you meant so much to Judi.  Thanks to Gina for putting these words down.....I'm so glad her house will have beloved child in it----it is definitely a house for happiness and love.....and I'm glad there's a little dog that looks like Wally and adores Gina.....

Thanks to Gina and all of Judi's friends.  In hindsight, my thanks are even greater than before.  Much love to all of you......