Ernie's Shoulder

Eh, today looks as though it's going to be one of those days.  I got up earlier than usual--which is good---because Owen kept talking to me while I was trying to sleep---which is bad.  Well, o.k...not bad but mildly irritating.  Got up, found that all my black skirts seem to have something wrong with them.  Perhaps I shouldn't have worn my favorite one to climb on the rocks in Maine, huh?  Brilliant Cynthia...just brilliant.  I finally chose the least offensive and put it on only to have Owen tell me it had a hole in it.  So I said, "I KNOW that Owen" which of course made him sad and I had to apologize and that kind of thing can be VERY lengthy with Owen.  Then I get on my gmail account and it says that an IP from China has accessed the account two days ago.  Perhaps they could have told me this two days ago.  Then more frustration with passwords and cameras and the like.

Ernie's off to get his infusion today and I can't go with him as it wouldn't go over well at work.  It's lousy timing as he was really down about it all yesterday.  I knew something was wrong whenever I talked to him on the phone yesterday but I didn't quite figure it out until I got home.  He's pretty stoic and goes along and goes along dealing with this crap.  I'm the emotional weathervane---always spinning to some new direction---but he's steady and positive.  But then every so often it hits him that he has cancer and that he's doing this to keep it from spreading further....and well, then it can hit hard.  Yesterday was one of those days.

I made him some comfort food for dinner, gave him some beer and watched American Pickers with him.  Then I tried to get him to go to bed early.....man, is that guy a pushover when he's putting the boys to bed and do they ever know it.  I don't think he slept all that well.

So off he goes to the Cancer Center without me.  I told the boys to be extra nice to him and I told Ernie I'd be on his shoulder.  That's what my mother always told me whenever I had something hard to do----a test at school or an interview....  So that's where I'll be today.  On Ernie's shoulder.